Fans of
Friday the 13th Part VIII
will appreciate
Mortician
's
Darkest Day of Horror
, which comes off as a sequel to a sequel in which the original premise, which wasn't very inspired in the first place, has been unceremoniously beaten to death with a shovel. This New York crew is like the walking undead adorning the cover of this typically splatter-caked opus: hack off its limbs and the zombie will still lurch forward, never straying from its brain-dead, single-minded purpose -- pure obliteration. Yawn. After six records, the joke has progressed beyond stale to moldy and distasteful,
unleashing another derivative
death metal
outing packed with ludicrous blast-mash rhythms (fueled by a drum machine), buzzsaw guitars, and indecipherable, mud-clogged vocals gurgling slasher-flick lyrics, the "songs" interspersed with snatches of horror movie dialogue. Again. While most musicians have a desire to progress in their craft,
madmen
Will Rahmer
and
Roger Beaujard
are content to keep their poker faces rigid and their boots firmly planted in the soil, stubbornly refusing to stray from long-petrified
stereotypes. Sure, the production on
Darkest Day
is admirable -- the guitar sound is admirably subterranean -- but nothing resembling a memorable riff or decent song peers through the sludge. The point being, if you've heard one
record, you've heard them all, and
serves only to try even the hardcore
fan's patience. ~ John Serba